Well, the day was a bit brighter as I woke this morning.
After long hours of thought last night, and a mild break down, Im feeling better.. just sleepy...
The kids and I went and got the Christmas tree.. it was very humorous Im sure if you would of seen us driving home w/a Christmas tree bungee corded to the top of my wee little
Jetta... the kids decorated the tree, as I sat and watched them drinking a nice
ice cold Bud Lite (by the way I hate Bud Lite.. but for some reason I have a 6 pack in the fridge)
At one point, we had to take a "safety" from each other.. which is our word when things get a little out of hand.. someone yells' "safety" and we all go to our respective rooms and chill for 15 min. Then come out and "communicate" about what happened and how we currently feel.
So.. the boy yelled SAFETY... and the kids went to their rooms.. and I cleaned up the dog piss.. which is why the boy yelled safety.. cuz the dog got freaked out by the tree...and pee'd in the dinning room because.. she's a stupid little black bitch..and pee'd on the fucking floor... and Mommy dearests head spun around and I lost it.. because the dog pee'd.. and the kids were arguing, and because the dog pee'd..ok.. honestly.. it was because of my actions over the weekend..
oh..hold on..I must breath and calm down...
Anyhow... things got better.. the tree is up..Im missing a huge box of decorations...
the tree topper, the tree skirt, my stocking holders.. plus the stockings... doesnt really surprise me.. nothing seems to surprise me anymore.
so.. I did some thinking last night, and while I watched the kids decorate the big fluffy, I dont like it tree.. I thought.. you know what.. it was just a "thing"
It happened.. so be it.. it was just a thing..
ok.. lets be honest here.. I had a HUGE thing for this guy.. I actually started to fall in.. oh Im not gonna say it, but the word starts w/an L.
I could of so easily, but, something went wrong, and we went our separate ways. And w/in a few weeks of he and I splitting, he was back together w/his ex and engaged to get married. It hurt, but it wasnt a painful hurt like Ive had in the past. Which makes me think that maybe just maybe I was more in love...with the thought of being in love.
Huge possibility... must think deeper on that one.
Anyhow... where was I?
wow.. Ive got issues...
so yeah.. as Weekends says... there just service dogs.. thank you so much.. I absolutely LOVE that choice of words.
and T too.. thank you both for your support.. I needed it....
Yep..Im single, and honestly for the most part Im ok with it...there are times I dont want to be single, and I honestly think it's only during the Christmas season. But then again... it would just end up costing me more..hahahaha....
Ok all.. Happy Tuesday.. Happy days.. and all that crap..
I probably should get some work done..
TTFN..
Peace
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2 comments:
I'm glad you're feeling better. I must try your "safety" tactic. It sounds so much more civilized than my standard tactic of "everybody shut the fuck up before I commit mass-murder!"
Well that safety idea sounds like a good one, and kudos to all of you for working on things, rather than letting the advice go in one ear and out the other!
Holidays make everyone lonely, even the ones with someone. I think it's like the flu, it spreads and sooner or later everyone has had a touch of it. It's normal, it sucks, but it's so normal.
Just remember you may be single, but you are also not tied down to a jerk who lies or cheats or makes up with his ex-girlfriend way too soon....
But on that note, he may have rebounded with her to ease the loss of you. If you can look at it that way it might not hurt so much.
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