Rainy Days

Upon my self-discovery tour, I realized I still have to stop and occasionally smell the flowers. Well in this part of the country, since the flowers are starting to wilt and die, I suppose I have to stop and smell, the rain.. assuming it ever shows again. We've had a rather dry spell lately, and I honestly miss the rain. How can one miss the rain? It's wet, and causes the roads to slick, and leave prints on the carpet and the paws from the doggies are muddy and then they leave muddy prints all over the carpet, not to mention my bed as they seem to think that my bed - since it's the biggest soft cushion in the house - is for them....rotten mongrels.

anyhow.. so, yeah I miss the rain. Nothing is better than sitting on my covered back porch, in the mornings, sipping a nice cup of coffee, with my morning paper or a good book, curled up in a blankie.. listening to the rain... as long as the wind isn't whipping, cuz if the wind is whipping about then well I'll get wet and well I don't want to get wet cuz then I would get cold and worse of all my coffee would get cold and that's just not acceptable.

Anyhow.. where was I.. ooohhh taking time out to enjoy things. Like that walk around the lake w/dogs & kids in tow. Sitting on a park bench in front of the fountains downtown watching the wee children of the community playing. Watching an eagle soar thru the sky. Whatever the case is, taking time out of your busy life to enjoy the small things. I never do that. It brings about a bit of peace, tranquility if you will. Life is so busy and non-stop that if you don't stop and look around you, your going to miss something.

Ive been trying to take the time out each week to do something. To take that extra 1/2 hr and just relax, appreciate, digest, whatever... it's important. I don't know if it actually brings a center of balance or whatever you want to call it. But for me. It helps. I'm always go go go go that I never stop and breath.

I get so worked up with the go go go that I tend to be on edge, not ok.. Ive had a hell of a road re-discovering who I am over the last few years.. the last few weeks have been even more of an eye opener for me. So many realizations of who I really am.. and how I really think. It's been mind opening.. and in some case's embarrassing and in other case's totally disgusting.

I had someone recently ask me to describe myself. I couldn't. How pathetic is that? I can physically describe me.. but to describe what I'm truly like, my thoughts, plans, outlook, who I perceive myself to be... I don't rightly know. Who I thought I was.. yeah.. but who I am upon this discovery road. I don't know.

So.. I asked a good friend of mine & co-worker to describe me. Normally, he has no problems with coming up with something. But he knows that I'm on this re-discovery. So he's going to think on it over the weekend. He says some of it I may not like, some of it may embarrass me, some of it I may argue about. But it will be a true & accurate out look.

Once I receive it.. I'll post it.. well maybe only the parts I like..

Anyhow.. other news:

Ive decided I'm never going to read our local paper again.
I know to many people in this sess pool that I call home.
This week alone, there have been 3 people that I personally know in the paper...
My son's uncle, from his dad's side of the family, he's a loser - meth addict.. got busted for pointing a laser pen at a State Patrol Plane that was in the air..
Then..a kid I used to watch, like 13 yrs ago, just registered as a Level 3 sex offender!!!
Todays paper... an ex friend of mine, had 31 animals seized from her home this week, and is facing animal & child neglect charges.

What a roller coaster week!!! Wow..
I need a new start..
Hmm.. maybe I'll move to Ireland, yeah, I don't know anyone there and I hear it's beautiful country

Peace & have a great weekend!!!